We humbly asked God to remove our shortcomings.
In Step 7, we need to form a working partnership with our Higher Power. We seek humility. Humility is defined in many ways including:
- the ability to face reality;
- knowing there is a Higher Power, and we, or our partner, are not it;
- we don’t think less of ourselves, but we think about ourselves less;
- we are spiritually no better than, but no less than anyone or any other couple.
The real change happens as we let go of our false pride and work to change in partnership with our Higher Power.
We frequently ask our Higher Power to remove our shortcomings. We know we can’t change our old ways of doing things on our own, but in partnership with our Higher Power, we can. The more we work the RCA program, the more our shortcomings are relieved. Many of us found contracts to be a vital tool in overcoming these shortcomings by adding accountability (see contract section). We learn to avoid being hungry, angry, lonely and tired (HALT) as those states seem to make our shortcomings worse. At the very least, we avoid making crucial decisions while experiencing those states.
A suggested Seventh Step Prayer (or meditation topic):
I want to be more sensitive to my partner,
As sensitivity to my partner opens awareness of my innermost self.
Higher Power help me become more open and aware.
I need to see my own fear behind my shortcomings:
My tendency to be sarcastic and stubborn,
My tendency to blame and make my partner wrong,
My need to make my partner feel disrespected and less than.
Higher Power, help me find the courage to acknowledge my own shortcomings,
instead of focusing on those of my partner.
I promise to try to use the coupleship tools I have learned
To stop interrupting my partner,
To speak from I statements,
And to acknowledge the strengths my partner brings to our coupleship.
Higher Power teach me humility and remove my character defects
so that I may love more sincerely and completely.