Motion: PayPal account in the US be moved to Canada/Europe to not have issues of ownership for US/IRS. Voted: Unanimous to move ahead with transition. Details to be determined at a future date. Dave & Noni of Canada said they would help.

Secretary Couple Position – Oscar & Annie – out to prayer and sponsor couple to consider position. Debbie & Ruth stepped down as co-secretary couple.

Chris (irw Emma) announced now available to make changes on website.

Addendum: Treasures report was received – not available at meeting:

Amounts in USD

  Beginning Ending
Total balance *1,223.90 1,465.74

 

  Debit Credit
Donations   265.00
Payment fees -23.16  
Online payments 0  
  1. Treasures report delayed – login issue – will be reported next week.
  2. Service positions:
    Co- secretary couple was announced.
    Welcome couple – ( Couple has it out to prayer!)
    Contact Couple – Mandy & Dwayne (previously called list couple)
  3. Decided to remove calendar couple – not being used

  1. Treasurers report for June 2017.
  2. New format to be tested? Like screen sharing! Also have script available on website to read or download. Secretary couple can assist leaders before or during meeting to help empower couples for service. They want to be trained!
    1. Action Item: Deb and Ruth will create a fun how-to video!
  3. Service positions: (Had a couple respond will select position!)
    1. Co-Secretary Couple (January)
    2. A US co-treasurer couple. (Open)
    3. Welcome Couple. (Open)
    4. Web-Keeper (Open)
  4. Action items to be done:
    1. Group conscience to create a downloadable pdf file for the Sunday script and email to contact list. Ruth will do
    2. Ruth will simplify website for position

 

For next month:

  1. Discuss purchasing a kindle version of RCA blue book for trailblazers.
Trailblazers and RCA Announcements
  • The meeting on the 10. december will start with a Business meeting. Read the minutes from last business meeting regarding proposal to move administration of RCA trailblazers.
  • The Trailblazers meeting needs your help. We have the following service positions open:
    1. Co-Secretary Couple (January)
    2. A US co-treasurer couple. (Open)

Please consider service to benefit your coupleship. The descriptions are on the website. Contact secretary@rcatrailblazers.org to volunteer.

  • There are more RCA zoom meetings available at www.ccc-hub.org including a beginners meeting.
Our common welfare should come first; couple recovery depends upon RCA unity.

As a fellowship we have seen that by working the Twelve Steps of the RCA program, our coupleships have grown in commitment and intimacy. The Twelve Traditions provide guidance and direction for the RCA fellowship. In order for the fellowship to flourish, the Twelve Traditions need to be understood and applied.

The Traditions are the glue and backbone of RCA itself. These Twelve Traditions come to us from the program of Alcoholics Anonymous and were adapted to the needs of our fellowship. We follow the Traditions to ensure the RCA fellowship will always be available for those couples who are recovering from addictions or dysfunctional behaviors that have affected their coupleships.

Many of us have found that doing service has helped to speed our healing process. We have a new sense of belonging when we learn to not isolate and to work with other couples.

Before recovery, many of us thought our own personal approach was the only correct one. However, we learned in our RCA groups to listen to our partner as well as other couples. We learned from other couples that partners have differing opinions and viewpoints. We became able to listen without judgment. We learned to share time with each other and not monopolize the group with “oh, ain’t it awful” stories. In our meetings, we learned to stay focused on the meeting topics. We learned to follow our Safety Guidelines and our group conscience process. Learning to respect the needs of the group taught us to respect the needs of our coupleship.

In addition to our own recovery, we have a responsibility to express ourselves to promote group unity. We have experience, strength and hope in our coupleships to share. We have histories that need to be heard which show we are not unique. As couples, we sometimes share just by listening and being present to hear other couples stories. However, if we consistently remain silent, it inhibits group unity.

Making newcomers feel welcome promotes RCA growth and unity. Some of the ways we have found helpful in making newcomers welcome are:

  • providing temporary sponsors,
  • giving out” newcomer” chips,
  • sharing how RCA has been helpful to us,
  • handing out “newcomer” packets with phone numbers of active members.
  • And of course, chatting informally with newcomers before and after the meeting.

 

For our group purpose there is but one ultimate authoritya loving God as known in our group conscience. Our leaders are but trusted servants; they do not govern.

Locally, we have service or leadership positions such as: secretaries or chairs, treasurers, group contact couples, or delegate couples. Nationally and internationally we may see people serving on the Board of Trustees of the World Service Organization, or on its committees.

Those are individuals and couples who are willing to devote time, work and dedication to the RCA Fellowship. These RCA members serve and direct our fellowship by following our group conscience. The positions do not give authority beyond the consent of the fellowship. Ultimate RCA authority is from the bottom up, not the top down.

Rotation of officers gives equal opportunity for service, and restricts dominance by any individual or couple. This rotation emphasizes group conscience rather the control by any individual. Following this Tradition emphasizes equality among all members, teaching us that equality is the cornerstone of our coupleships.

Even when there is difficulty in finding someone to take a leadership position, it is important not to allow an individual or couple to continue doing the work indefinitely simply because they are willing to do so. People who remain in leadership positions too long can begin to feel theyre indispensable, or conversely, feel put upon or used, Therefore, we search for, and encourage, couples and members to volunteer for positions Service helps a couple experience growth in their coupleship

The Second Tradition reminds us not to assume authority over a sponsee couple. Our purpose is not to give advice or impose a decision. Sponsor couples agree to share their own experience, strength and hope. They are fair witnesses helping sponsee couples see their own processes as well as providing a safe space to work on their issues and options.

Longtime RCA couples may be helpful in starting new groups. Their role should be to guide the development and structure of the meetings, but then encourage other couples to assume the leadership roles as they gain program knowledge and experience.

The group conscience is what governs the group, and we arrive at this conscience, by open discussion. We set limits on holding office. We share the workload. This Tradition protects and safeguards all of us and our group. When this tradition is followed a state of humility exists because the source of authority is our higher power..

The only requirement for RCA membership is a desire to remain in a committed relationship.

Tradition Three tells us who are eligible to be members of RCA. We are couples committed to restoring healthy communication, caring, and greater intimacy to our coupleships. We suffer from addictions, co-addictions, or other dysfunctions; some of these identified and some not, some treated and some not. We also come from many levels of brokenness. Many of us have been separated or near divorce. Some of us are new in our coupleships and seek to build intimacy as we grow together as couples. We may refuse no couple who wishes to recover.

Ultimately, we feel it is important for both partners to be involved in individual recovery for real progress to be made in our coupleships. However, individual recovery is not a requirement to get started in couple recovery. RCA is a safe place to begin the healing process, and it offers support for continued individual work.

Any two or more couples gathered together for restoring the commitment, communication and caring to their relationship may call themselves an RCA group, provided that, as a group, they have no other affiliation.

Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or RCA as a whole.

Each RCA group is autonomous and responsible to its own group conscience. However, we strive to conduct our work in the program according to the spiritual principles outlined in the Traditions. Following our Traditions safeguards our program, guiding us while not controlling us, allowing us to act independently but reminding us to be ever mindful of our group as part of the larger fellowship.

RCA is less a top-down organization than a bottom-up fellowship made up of couples in recovery. But when our plans concern the welfare of neighboring groups, those groups ought to be consulted. No group, regional committee, couple or individual should ever take any action that might affect RCA as a whole without conferring with World Service Board. On such issues our common welfare must be paramount.

Each group is responsible to conduct itself in a way that is good for the fellowship as a whole. The RCA Blue Book has Safety Guidelines and a suggested meeting format in it to explain how to conduct meetings. Each group is free to choose its own meeting program and topics for discussion; to decide where and when it shall meet and how the funds will be apportioned..

We all strive to carry a unified message to the couples who are still suffering. To do this, it is RCAs intention to be open to all sincere couples; to use conference approved literature; and provide a safe place for the sharing of our pain and hope. To check how well we are doing this, it is suggested each meeting regularly take its own inventory. Further, it suggested that local groups conduct periodic business meetings where discussion at length may be indicated. Minority opinions are to be aired and taken into consideration Each RCA group is responsible to take the time to know the Traditions and understand why they are important to the Fellowship.

Each group has but one primary purposeto carry its message to recovering couples who still suffer.

Tradition Five suggests that we will best be able to help other couples who are still suffering when we first help ourselves practice the Twelve Steps. The Twelve Steps give us the guidance we need to:

  • share our own experience, strength and hope with other couples,
  • give comfort to other couples, and
  • listen to other couples.

Each Recovering Couples Anonymous group ought to be a spiritual entity having but one primary purpose that of carrying its message of intimacy and commitment to couples who still suffer.

Many couples come to RCA not knowing if they belong. Some may not even be aware that anything is wrong with their coupleship. In RCA we have the “Characteristics of Dysfunctional Couples,” which is a list to help couples identify problem areas in their coupleships. Couples do not have to relate to all of these to admit their coupleships are suffering or to seek help or guidance. The identification of such characteristics serves to let us know that “we are not alone” in our struggle to find intimacy.

RCA believes that a coupleship is like an infant, needing constant nurturing and care from both partners. It is important that each partner accepts responsibility for the problems or progress of the coupleship, and that each recognizes individual recovery as an important factor for couple recovery. In RCA we think of coupleship as being represented by a three-legged stool: our individual recovery, our partner’s recovery, and our coupleship recovery are all important “legs” to the serenity, stability, and intimacy we seek.

When we welcome newcomer couples to our fellowship, we share our experience, strength and hope. We offer spiritual support and the opportunity to connect with other couples, typically through sponsorship, meetings, and RCA social events. We provide -approved literature, the Blue Book, the newcomer brochure, and where possible a listing of meetings in the area and local phone numbers. Tradition Five reflects that in order to “get the program,” we must “give it away!”